A Reason to Hope
by Boombubble
Summary: A "What If?" type of fic based after when Sora gets kidnapped by Datamon. Common event, common theme, but I believe I managed to make this unique.


Howdy! I don't usually write anything this short, but I wanted to get a couple fic's up right away. This is a "What if" type of fic based after the episode where Datamon kidnaps Sora. A very common theme, but when this idea popped into my head I knew I had to do something with it. (I haven't read anything else that appears too similar to this, please let me know if you've read something that has.) This fic is a little different from what I'm use to writing. It's based completely off of the thoughts and emotions that Tai is feeling at this moment in his life. It can be uplifting, or sad depending on how the reader wants to look at it. This isn't my best work, but when inspiration hits you, you have to at least try. It'll drive you completely insane if you don't do something with it!

Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, or the small song excerpt at the end.

A Reason to Hope

Tai stared out over the hilltop, a dozen roses in his left hand. This spot wasn't that far from the sight where the Digi-destined first met the Digimon, and the whole crazy story began. A lot had happened since then. The new Digi-destined were handling things in the Digital World, and the older kids had been left out in the cold more times than not. Tai had been drawn to this place for a very special reason. He'd come every year on the anniversary of the day it happen, which had been exactly five years ago today, or any other time the mood hit him which was rather often. The events of that day still stayed oh so fresh in his mind, replaying over and over like a horrible never ending nightmare. That was a day when he felt like he lost a part of himself. They were duped by a cagey Digimon named Datamon, who in-turn kidnapped Sora. Tai had a chance to go after them, but he froze allowing Datamon to slip away. He eventually caught up with them, but by the time he did he was way too late. All he found when he finally got there was Biyomon crying over Sora's lifeless body, and the scattered remains of a cheap copy that Datamon had created in hopes of controlling the Crest of Love. Soon, he found himself crying right along side the helpless Digimon. One split second of hesitation turned out to be the single biggest mistake of his life. He had lost his best friend, and someone who could've been a lot more if had ever worked up the nerve to tell her how he felt about her. That's another thing that killed... Sora had been his guiding light through the dark times of this ordeal. He tried to act big, and hotdog around the other's as much as he possibly could, but he was no where near as cocky and self-confident as he made himself out to be. There were times he grew so frightened or homesick he was almost reduced to tears. There were some nights where he and Sora would sneak off away from the group, and Tai would spill all his fears and doubts to her. She had always believed in him, and helped him find a little faith himself when he couldn't find any on his own. For Tai however, that was no where near what hurt the most. When Datamon had abducted her, she cried out for help. She didn't call Matt. She didn't call out to Izzie, or any of her other friends either. She called for him. He could still hear her calling out his name as Datamon carted her away. She was counting on him to save her, and he let her down. She was dead because of him. Because he was afraid. He didn't want to imagine what was going on in her mind in her final moments, but there were times he forced himself to. That was his own self-inflicted punishment on himself. He hated to imagine her cowering with fear on that table, wondering where he was, and why he wasn't there to help her. What she must've thought of him when she finally realized he wasn't going to make it in time. After she died, for the longest time he did nothing but beat himself up, and blame himself for Sora's death. Though none of the others came right out and blamed him, he could tell they all did at least a little. Matt wouldn't look him in the face for the longest time, and Mimi didn't speak to him for a week. It wasn't long before they defeated Ettimon, and Tai was sucked back into the real world. He highly considered never returning so he couldn't hurt anybody else, but his sister Kari convinced him to return. He did reluctantly, and to his surprise the others greeted him rather warmly, but there was still some tension in the air. Most of it forming from Tai himself. Out of all people it would be TK that would open up his eyes. The boy still looked up to him for some reason, and through him Tai found the resolve to press on. It was during this time that Tai learned just why TK was the bearer of the crest of hope, and Tai would slowly begin to turn his life around. Fighting through the pain of his loss, he grew stronger and much more serious about his role as leader of the Digi-Destined. He eventually grew into the leader Sora always told him he could be, and used her memory and the strong friendship she always showed towards him as his driving force. All of it built around the foundation of making sure he never made the same mistake again. He made a promise on Sora's grave he would live the rest of his life for both of them, and become the man she always told him he could be if he put his mind to it. He took that promise to heart, and led his friends on to defeat the likes of Myotismon and the Dark Masters. It even spread to his everyday life once they had left the Digital World. He was a straight A student in school now, led his soccer team to three consecutive district titles, and excelled in just about everything else he did. He vowed never to take anything else in life for granite since that day. Every time he doubted himself, which was still often, he would picture his departed friend's face, and that would give him the extra resolve he needed to press on. Every time he faced an evil Digimon, every time he took a shot at the goal in soccer, and every time he had to watch Kari head off into the Digital World alone without being able to protect her. Another concern of his was that Davis boy... Davis reminded Tai so much of himself when he was younger it worried him to death. He was so reckless, cocky, and hardheaded. Tai was so afraid that Davis might make the same mistakes he had. Davis idolized him, so Tai tried his absolute best to stir Davis onto the right path, hoping Davis could learn from his mistakes before making them himself. He knew of Davis's infatuation with his sister, and the thought that Kari may face the same fate Sora had sacred Tai out of his wits. He barely survived Sora, and losing Kari would be devastating. Knowing TK was there with her helped to ease his tension a bit, but he had very understandably grown into the worrying kind. Kari was the biggest thing in his life now that Sora was gone, who had always run a close second. He had to smile at the thought of TK and Kari together. He had thought of TK like a younger brother for a long time now, and the way they were going it looked as if they may actually be brothers a few years down the road. That was okay with him. He couldn't think of anyone else he'd rather see his baby sister with then TK....... There were many that wanted him to forget about Sora, and move on with this life. He had moved on, but forgetting about her was something he wasn't willing to do. It was her memories that fueled his drive to get on with his life. The hope that she was looking down on him, and smiling at the man he was becoming. The person she always thought he could be, and that he couldn't begin to think of himself as until she was gone. That was the irony of it all. He was still in love her, and he saw no signs of that ending anytime soon. Would he fall in love again?... Probably. He was sure he'd love again, maybe even find someone he loved more than Sora. Would he find someone that would touch his heart in the way she had?... No chance in hell.

Tai set the bouquet at the base of the large tree he had been staring at for the past twenty minutes. Unfortunately, Sora's body was sucked up in the darkness along with the rest of the dark network, and they couldn't give her a proper burial. This was the spot they chose to pay their respects to her, at a small unmarked grave known only to them and their Digimon. It meant a whole lot more for them to gather in the Digital world, especially for Tai, then the empty plot at the cemetery back home. It just didn't feel right without the Digimon with them. The others would be along later, and he'd be with them as well, but it was important for him to visit alone for at least a bit...

"I'm sorry it's been so long since the last time I visited Sora. I know it's been too long..., but I don't have access to the Digital World whenever I need it. A lot's happened over the past few months. There are three new Digi-Destined now. Their names are Davis, Yolie, and Cody. They'll be with the others when they stop by to visit later. Kari's adjusted very well after discovering she was the Eight Child. It was kind of rough for her at first because a lot of the other guys looked at her like she was trying to replace you or something, but she stayed tough. I really wish you could've seen her, you would've been proud of her. She really looked up to you a lot you know." Tai giggled at some old memories he'd started digging out of the back of his mind. "I remember when she was three, and you got her calling me dodie head! To think Mom and Dad thought it was funny! It took me six months to get her out of that. Was that anyway to treat your best friend?! Anyway, my baby sis really caught the hearts of everyone after a while. Especially TK. If only you could see those two right now! They swear up and down that they're just friends, but that's not fooling anyone. I always knew I was going to have to worry about Kari and boys someday, but not when she was twelve! Not that I really have to worry about TK though. Now that Davis is another story... That boy's just like me. You'd love him! He's not exactly the first person I'd want leading me into battle, but somehow he manages to get the job done. Just like I did... Yolie can be a little eccentric at times, but she's a good kid. Little Cody's a fiery little guy. I'll tell you one thing, he's the most mature nine-year-old I ever meet! Even more than me... I can just picture you up there giggling, and saying something like that isn't all that hard..." 

Tai released a depressing laugh, and wiped away a tear that had trickled down his face. "Anyway... The other's are just fine. Mimi's still living in America, and she flew in this morning just to see you. Joe's still studying to be a doctor, and Izzie's still a computer nerd. Matt's band is doing pretty well for themselves..." Tai frowned playfully, and looked up at the sky defiantly. "Yes, he's still cute! I guess... For my sake I'm going to assume you only said that to make me jealous. Biyomon's doing great. She was lost without you for the longest time, but now she's found another purpose in her life. She's taken it upon herself to look out for her friends in that Yokomon village we ran across...."

Tai felt his tears pushing against his eyelids, and he knew he couldn't hold them back much longer. He could feel the flood barrier he built around his heart beginning to tear away, from the force of the river of emotion rushing against it. "I still think about you... Hell, I think about you all the time. That still worries my family and friends, but it's different than it was before. I use to get depressed and angry at myself whenever I thought of you... I use to think of you because I didn't have a chose... *sniff* You were the first thing I thought of every time I thought I'd finally gotten you off my mind. But now I think of you because I want to. For some reason when I remember you now I always feel better somehow. The way you laughed, the way you smiled, the way you were so kind and caring to everyone, and just how wonderful of a friend and person you really were...*sob* Most of all the way you'd encourage me, and the faith you always kept in me. They pushed me to push myself to be the best I can be at everything I do. The thought that you might be up there watching, and smiling down at me. Because I really want to prove you right. You gave me a reason to hope....*sniff* I've spent a lot of time wondering what you'd look like as an angel. Probably the exact same way as you did on Earth. Maybe if I live my life the right way, I'll see you again someday..."

Tai's barrier completely collapsed, and his body flooded. He let the teardrops streak down his face, growing to tired to fight them off anymore. It felt like the right time anyway. He didn't cry much anymore. He saved his tears for special occasions, and in this case for Sora. "Please... Please forgive me Sora. Don't misunderstand me, I'm not asking you to forgive me for causing your death this time. I stopped blaming myself for that a few months back. If there is anyone to blame it's that bastard Datamon! It will always be partially my fault in a way, and I accept that, but I also know the last thing you would want me to do is torture myself the way I have. I know you cared about me way too much to want to watch me be miserable like that. I'm sorry Sora. Please forgive me... for not forgiving myself sooner."

Tai dried his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt, and pushed himself up to his feet. He spent the next few minutes staring up into the sky remembering all the good times they had together, and all the little things he loved about her. He smiled feeling more at ease with himself, like he did a little more everyday. "I guess I'll be going now Sora. I'll be back a little later with the others. I seem to miss you a little more everyday, but I'm glad I had the chance to know well enough in order to miss you this much. Thank you for always being with me. I hope a part of me has always been with you." 

Tai pounded on his chest twice, and then pointed to the sky. For the first time that afternoon, he realized what a beautiful day it was in the Digital World. He decided to take a stroll through the forest, while softly singing a most appropriate tune, for the way he was feeling, to himself. Not very well mind you, but there was no one else around to hear him. "It's a great day to be alive. I know the sun's still shining when I close my eyes. There's some hard times in the neighborhood, but why can't everyday be just this good?"

end.

-Sorry for the rather weak ending. This wasn't quite as strong as I wanted it to be, but I've only been doing this for a little under a year now, and I'm still learning as I go. I'm thinking about doing a couple more fic's like this, one for each of my favorite characters. Not "What if" fic's, but stories focusing on how the character is feeling during a pivotal moment of their life. It all depends on the type of response this gets.

I'd like to thank everyone that read and reviewed my debut Like Brother, Like Sister. I was really surprised by the nice response I've gotten for it so far. I highly doubted it would take, mostly because of how horribly long it was. I haven't noticed that many other Digimon fic's even half that length, so I appreciated all of you who didn't let the 247KB and 40,000 word icons scare you away. You made four months of hard work well worth it. I received a suggestion from Time Lady, whose opinion I respect deeply, to split it up into chapters, and I'm highly considering doing that. If it makes it easier for people to read then so be it. I just worry about doing it correctly, without accidentally wiping out the story in the process! 

Special thanks to Kale and Betsy for honoring me by welcoming me to the clan of TaKari, so to speak. They are one of my favorite Anime couples, but I'm by no means limited to just them, or only Digimon fics. I am working on another big project called Please Take It, which will be a TaKari...sweet, but it will be at the very least a month before I can hope to finish that. I have some other material I hope to have out soon, but none of that is Digimon related. Sorry guys. 


End file.
